The last gasp of "Git 'er done"
Last night at the Riviera Comedy Club in Las Vegas, as I launched into the set-up for my Cyrano de Bergerac joke, someone in the crowd yelled, "Git 'er done!"
Many comedians would find this irritating. Not me. Maya Angelou made clear that the reason the caged bird sings is because it is his only form of expression. The same holds true for the "Git 'er done" guy, although his particular imprisonment takes the form of a limited vocabulary. God bless Larry the Cable Guy for supplying him with an easily repeatable, trisyllabic mantra to alleviate the workload of that sputtering, lonely brain cell in his severely dented skull. How else would he be able to free himself from the bonds of his own incoherency? No longer is he limited by his stunted thoughts and floundering speech. He has been liberated! The door to his verbal cage has been kicked open with the memorization of three simple words.
"Git 'er done!" he bellows, hoping that 'er will truly git done. He's not sure why, but he knows in his heart that 'er must finally be brought to a conclusion. He can't remember when the 'ering actually began or how long it has been going on, but he can tell you definitively that 'er has run its course and is due for termination. The completion of 'er is paramount, he thinks, even though he doesn't know what paramount means. All 'ering should cease and desist, he declares, even though he suspects both of those words mean pretty much the same thing. Please God, he prays, let people know that 'er can at last be put to rest. Let them know that any further involvement with 'er will be impossible because 'er has left the building, ladies and gentlemen, no more 'er, finito, dead and gone, pennies on the eyes and six feet under, with a gravestone that reads, "Here lies 'Er, who has finally been gotten done."
Next on the agenda: Getting 'im done.
copyright 2007 john bizarre
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